I wrote this today in an email to Julie - that I didn't send...

'Men suck! Yep, all of 'em... lovers, coworkers, even brothers! I am so hopping mad at my brother right now and I have no where to vent it! I could beet him to a pulp if he were here. Not really because he's much stronger than I am and he fights dirty but you know what I mean! Anyway, he's such a big baby! I was talking to Mom the other day and she said that she is coming on the 17th now instead of the 18th. Well, I had already promised Sheena and two of her friends that I would take them out to supper and then to the Greenday concert that night. So I said Tom could probably pick her up, not to worry. After I got off the phone, I called Stacey about something else and, in passing, as we were hanging up because she was in a rush to bring Tom to the airport, I asked if Tom was working on the 17th and maybe he could pick Mom up. And then I said to tell Tom congratulations on his promotion (which Mom told me about... I even said to Mom isn't it funny that I have to hear about his promotion through her when he and I live 20 minutes apart). Well, when Stacey relayed those two things he got all pissy and actually started a fight with her because I should have called him and told him congratulations myself and not to tell him what to do because he had plans on the 17th, too and who the hell do I think I am? What a scum bag! Now Stacey is all upset about having a fight with him and being caught in the middle. I can't rag him out because then he'll know that Stacey told me, I can't tell Mom because she'll get into her 'pack your bags, you're going on a guilt trip' mode and say 'well, I just won't come then'. And, to top it all off, I can't go to a concert that I was really looking forward to and now Stacey and I aren't going to the Trews concert tonight that I was really looking forward to because Tom gets back from his trip tonight and she needs to kiss his ass for a while so he won't be mad at her anymore. I can't stand that asshole! Like grow the hell up, you big baby! (and you know that I'm controlling my swearing because you're at work!) The thing he apparently doesn't get is that, if I weren't friends with Stacey, I probably would have no contact with him at all. Is he jealous because I like her better? Well, I do but it's his fault. When he had that big flip out at me last year, all of my unnecessary dealings with him ended. The only reason that I backed down and decided to be civil with him is because of Stacey. I don't need someone in my life that speaks to me like I am a piece of garbage... I don't care who he is. You know, just a couple of days ago I was thinking that it was too bad our relationship had gotten where it had because I kind of miss talking to him and getting his advice and encouragement but thank you for reminding me what a jerk you really are because I'm over those feelings now. Why should he get to be a big goddamn baby and everyone else has to suffer? Like I was telling him 'what to do'... I guess that's the same as asking him for a favor and it's my mistake to think that any man would do something for me out of the kindness of his heart or something. I repeat: MEN SUCK! Is there one on the planet that doesn't?'

Crap, my hand is tired now. But, seriously! My vent helped, though. It was weighing heavily earlier but I had a bit of a cry while I wrote that and it helped. I need to stop writing and go to bed!