I don't know if I will want to send this but I keep composing it in my head so I figured I might as well write it down at least.
Hi Rob:
Well, this is sorta weird and embarrassing so I guess I'll jump right in... would you be interested in meeting me for a drink or something one day, just me and you? No pressure, no strings, no expectations. Just a couple of grown ups hanging out when Nathan is busy with other things.
After I sent you that 'copy and paste' email last night, I remembered how much fun I had in our early email days... I really used to look forward to our back and forth conversations, you made me laugh and I enjoyed how you would get excited about your son and his sports. Before we met I remember thinking that, even if the romantic stuff didn't pan out, you were someone I would like to have as a friend. I felt we kind of clicked somehow.
And that made me wonder why we didn't click in person. Obviously, I don't know how you feel about it all but I would like to tell you the answer from my perspective.
To start, simply put... I choked. I have not liked someone new in a long, long time and, as soon as I saw you on that soccer field, I ran face first into a wall of insecurity that I used to hide behind oh so many years ago. I was attracted to you and I reacted by pulling away.
Also, I never dated anyone who had a child before. I was so busy having fun with Nathan that day at the aquarium that I overlooked the fact that you and I were supposed to be getting to know each other, too. And I sometimes tend to get caught up in observing the world and forget to just let my guard down and participate. There are many things that I wanted to know about you but somehow I didn't ask... I guess I thought it would keep for another day.
You said that I was great with kids but I'm great with grown-ups, too... I didn't take the chance that I had to show you that so I'm asking for another. And I honestly have no expectations here - I have no idea of your perspective on this - I just felt that I needed to ask the question... because you never know...
Okay, okay... you win!! The truth is I just want to see your burnt nose!! lol
Hope you guys had a good practice... what a beautiful day!
Bev
*** And I just sent it. 6pm
