I was just giggling to myself about the strange side effects of letting go of those things that I tried so hard to control. This might sound stupid to you but it's who I am/was.
I would always run out of Diet Coke before I got more, I would have to bring my gas tank practically W (for Walk!) before I would get gas. All of those extremes that I was talking about the day that I had my Let It Be epiphany are different now. I don't do all or nothing. If I feel like going for a run, I go for a run; if I don't feel like going for a run, I don't go for a run and I accept that today I just don't feel like it but tomorrow I probably will again so beating myself up and giving me so much shit did not help (read: made things worse) and all I did was make myself feel like shit. I don't care if my place is a bit of a mess when people come over but if I want to clean it up, I just do; sometimes it's tidy, sometimes not, depends on the day. I am nicer to people. I reach out my hand to help when before I would have thought about it, I would have wanted to help but did nothing. Perhaps I have been cured of my 'poor me' syndrome!
And now I am going to get ready to go for a run. Because I feel like going for a run. =)
