The really funny thing about it is that, after all of this time of feeling like crap, it's hard to pull back out of the habits. I think I had nachos/cheese/sour cream/salsa for supper every day for two weeks (or close!). And the not being able to work, to study, to concentrate. Now I feel okay, I can do these things but I keep stopping my work to putter online and I am sitting here trying to convince myself that I should go to a movie after work instead of run/study. I tell myself that it would be a treat, a welcome back evening - which would inevitably include some other stuff. But I have been slacking off for so long that now I need to get back at it.
And why do I want Ian to call/email. Why? Why? Seriously, wtf? I'm a freak. I guess it's nice to have someone that wants to be with you. But wouldn't we just go down that same road again? Part of me wants him to chase, the other part will be happy if he doesn't... so I guess I am on the fence and we will just have to wait and see what happens next.
